Embarrassing romantic mont Have you ever had sothing truly embarrassing happen in the midst of whabeen a romantic scene Picture this. A couple of weeks before my wedding I broke my hand. We had planned our honeymoon at a lake resort. This was already beginning to look like a problem since I couldn't get the cast wet. With the lake tivities out of the picture we decided to focus on "indoor tivities". On the wedding night things went as you might expect for a very young couple Air Jordan 6 For Sale , then we drifted off to sleep. My new husband woke up during the night and sat up in bed. I ca half awake and caught the image of a man sitting next to in bed. Shocked and disoriented at this unaustod situation I did just what any good girl would do. I scread and plowed that cast covered broken hand into his left eye with a right hook that Foreman would have admired. He scread in ock and pain. I scread in pain as the impt ran up my broken tarpals. When we stopped screaming we got eh other ice pks and aspirin, forgave eh other and decided to do sothing other than sleep,10 Biggest Bad Ass Ani Gunslingers.okay. you wanted to know. as if the girdle incident wasn't enough,moncler jket. i had prepared a very romantic al. egg rolls with redded carrots. murooms pineapples. onions. petite peas. fried rice with chopped eggs, red onions. peas . slivers of carrots. crab foo yong. stir fry brooli and beef. but those of you who know . know that i am anything but normal.(hold on! i'm getting there!) the atmosphere was nicely set. candles. soft jazz. dinner went great.this was our first romantic night together. i was nervous as all get out. after dinner. one thing led to another. sensuality was abound. really crusin' here. so perfect. and as things were heating up. i felt this awful bloating.(see. there you go and i haven't even finied yet) talk about the high price of gas and i wasn't even at the pump! i could feel it rising up inside. ow! what the hell was i gonna do!. i had totally forgotten that the al i prepared was loaded with gassy food ingredients! too late now.(will you stop!) yeah. . i was holdin' on to a really large "air biscuit" that i couldn't afford to have floating at the mont.(don't you dare sit there and t like this didn't happen to you) i managed to muddle through. keeping my posure.so imdiately after playing "rompus room". i made a wild da to the bathroom. told my hunny,red wing oes. i was going to draw a bath for us. whew! i thought i handled that one really well. went to the bathroom. forgot to close the door. leaned over the tub to draw the bath. and KABOOOM! i let go of the biggest "air biscuit" that had more fire power than George Bu could have dropped on the Taliban.! (not funny). so with a sigh of relief i felt i had saved myself from an embarrassing mont. until i turned around. (stop laughing!)there in the doorway stood my (now husband) with a smile. he's such a good man under fire.(just stop it!) he just smiled and asked if i needed help with the bath water.(mortification of all mortifications!)moral of the story is:. don't eat gassy foods before sex.!doesn't that just blow you away.! 8-OJUST MY MOO!the sky was beautiful and the sounds of the ocean was very romantic. My bf brought a blanket to sit on. Well, things went a little further and he said "trust " (famous last words!) Just as things got interesting a beam from a flalight hit my eyes as a cop was looking for us!As we scrambled for our clothes the officer walked away. We both knew that the officer had seen us but gave us a little privy.As we made our way to the car sothing had crawled up into the pant leg of my jeans and was biting the inside of my leg! As we drove off I was screaming and my boyfriend was terrified!It was in the old, old days when we had to make our own amusents . and when, if you wanted to do any serious courting, you were confined to the bk seat of a car (if you were lucky enough to have one) or to strolling through the outdoors in search of a quiet ple where you could lay down your blanket and . well Air Jordan 5 For Sale , I don't need to tell you.My first boyfriend and I had approhed the whole business with a deal of delicy, taking our ti to get to the Real Thing. taking a friend's poodle for a walk. Said poodle had been trained to play various tricks, including Hide and Seek (either human or dog could be 'it'). So we told the dog to count to one hundred before looking for us, and just at the point when things were getting serious the boyfriend vented a very loud and surprised cry of astonint. Not what you might think; the dog, observing a nice pink bottom waving in the air, had bounded up and given it a darned good lick,canada goose outlet.That, however, pales in parison to the story of Etiquette, Etiquette. You might know that I used to do a lot of work in Northern Ireland during the Troubles - trying to be on the side of the angels. All the people I worked with were half-crazy; after all Air Jordan 4 For Sale , they could eh have taken a well-paid and safe job on the mainland, but had decided to stay and do their best for their native patch of land. Being half-crazy was the only way to cope, so we had so tis (wait for the moirs).A few years later, I was bk giving a talk at a conference, and I ran into one of my old mates at the bar. After the usual round of pleasantries, it was 'And what are you doing now' and he said that he was writing a book about a boy growing up in Belfast in the 1960s - swearing that it was not autobiographical. I asked the prospective title, and he replied Etiquette, Etiquette. So, obeying what was expected of , I asked why Air Jordan 3 For Sale , and he told about this incident that - he swore - had happened to a friend of his while out courting a new date. 'Twas front of the car business as usual, and so he essayed a couple of kisses and a foray around the bk of her neck; was not repulsed. So, feeling both amorous and hurried, he slid his hand up her skirt. She took it away and pled it firmly on her bosom, saying as e did so 'Etiquette, etiquette: start with the
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